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Post by genesis273 on Dec 7, 2017 7:32:42 GMT -5
Stuck in a bit of a valley these days. I know there are times when God removed Himself from you because you're living in sin or out of His will. But I believe there's also times when He makes His presence feel absent because He's wanting more from us. He's wanting us to seek Him harder, lean on Him more, and grow for Him. That's where I am now. I'm in that growing stage again and could use a little help from my fellow prayer warriors to get through it. He seems so distant most the time but, He still gives me a crumb or two to let me know He's still with me.
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Post by genesis273 on Dec 7, 2017 7:41:44 GMT -5
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Post by Jamie Brooks 1John5:13 on Dec 7, 2017 8:38:34 GMT -5
You are correct genesis. For decades I didn't know what was really happening when in a situation as you describe. It CERTAINLY felt as if He had abandoned me, but we know this is not true from his promises in His Word.
When reading Job, I noticed that Satan mentioned to God that He had a fence around Job ...a protective fence. I believe when we go through wilderness periods, God lifts the spiritual fence around us. When this happens, it really feels that he is so very far away. It's the most bizarre feeling that I've ever had and never want it again.
Even though God cannot tempt us, he can lead us into it as mentioned in the Lord's prayer. This allows the evil ones to do what they do best ...temp, torment and destroy. God allows it for a purpose as you mention. It can be to chastise or to mold us into a vessel that He can use for his glory. Sometimes he just let us do what we so badly want to teach us that what we REALLY want is His will in our lives, because it is always best. He is so very complex that cannot understand all his ways, so this is why we blindly trust.
During these wilderness experiences we learn and grow much. He really is molding whether he's chastising, trying to put us on a path he desires, or just simply allowing it as he did to Job for an example. A faith that can't be tested, cannot be trusted.
Yes, he allowed it in my life to a point where everyday all I could think about is dying. The physical and emotional pain was truly to a point where I could NOT bear it anymore. This point came much beyond what I thought. We just do not know what this point is until we reach it. We think it all along, but when it comes...
I have since imagined what God actually said to the evil ones upon unleashing them to torment me. I'm confident of one thing, and this is that they could not take my life. Even though I longed to die, God always provided a way out. Even when I knew that I had to go home to kill myself, because of the hopeless state, he had my doctor call me on my cell phone.
From my experience, I think that it may not be possible for a truly born again Christian to kill one's self. It may be something that God just will not allow. I don't know, but looking back, God let me be pushed to the edge of that extreme, but would not let it happen.
He is in control. Yes, we can get ourselves in some really big messes, but God will use it to mold us, teach us and bring us closer to him.
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Post by genesis273 on Jan 6, 2018 9:08:53 GMT -5
Just wanted to update this post. I wanted to let you know that He doesn't seem as distant these days!
We've been through some trials this past month. Started with the heat going out in my shop. Some of you know that I do cerakoting and Hydrographics in my shop and without heat, I cannot paint, clear coat or dip. Frustrating. I was agitated about it but, I didn't let myself lose my cool over it. And I trusted God would make a way. This past Thursday I was able to order an actual furnace rather than the electrical unit I was using before.
On December 15 my wife got up at 5am with her heart racing. We took her to the er where her heart was between 180-200 for 3 hours! She was tacicardic and in Afib. They tried a couple different medications at different doses to no avail. They ended up having to sedate her and shock her back into rthym. We also discovered that her thyroid levels were elevated. This trip to the er was of course followed by several doctor visits and a trip to a cardiologist. Normally I would start stressing about medical bills. However, I hadn't even considered them. I know He will provide!
Upon arriving at home from her first trip to the cardiologist I entered the front door. She was still on the front porch and stomped the snow off her boots. As she did the front porch collapsed. The sound startled me. I knew what had happened and was afraid to even look. But when I rushed out there she was. Just standing on the ruble. She smiled and we both just laughed about it. Again, I usually would have been mad and worried about the cost of replacing it but not this time. I've had a peace of mind in knowing the God would yet again provide. The following day (even though it was -3 degrees) I was able to tear out the old and get lumber for the new and replace it.
God knew these events were going to take place and I believe His absence from me was to make me draw nearer to Him. To see if I'd seek Him more, trust Him more, and have the faith that He'd provide. And ultimately it was to help me give birth to a greater relationship with Him.
I truly am so grateful for His presence in my life. He has never failed me or forsaken me. He loves us so much!
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Post by Pinoc on Jan 6, 2018 23:35:26 GMT -5
Like the old story goes “Lord the hardest times in my life there was only one set of footprints in the sand. Why did you leave me? And The Lord replies those are the times I carried you”. He never leaves us even when it seems like He does. He is always preparing us for what is to come in our lives. The hard part is realizing when He is doing that. Glad His Peace is seeing you through these rough times.
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